{"id":1715,"date":"2015-11-27T15:28:48","date_gmt":"2015-11-27T20:28:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.nejm.org\/general-medicine\/?p=1715"},"modified":"2015-11-27T15:28:48","modified_gmt":"2015-11-27T20:28:48","slug":"a-generation-of-softies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.nejm.org\/general-medicine\/index.php\/2015\/11\/a-generation-of-softies\/","title":{"rendered":"A Generation of Softies"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Ahmad<\/a>

Ahmad Yousaf, MD, is the 2015-16 Ambulatory Chief Resident in Internal Medicine at Rutgers New Jersey Medical School.<\/p><\/div>\n

I watch as my almost-2-year-old daughter awkwardly climbs the stairs. I do not hold her hand, but I do not turn my back on her either. She is still clumsy, and her little bowed legs often miss their targeted landing spots. She holds on to the rail with a vice grip that steadies each monumental step forward and upward. Every so often she wobbles as she miscalculates the distances and her toes barely catch the edge of the next step. Her knuckles become white as she reorients herself, recalculates her next move, and ensures she does not tumble backwards. My palms\u00a0sweat and my muscles tense during every mishap and sway\u2026 I want her to get to the top\u2026 but just as importantly, I want her to do it herself.\u00a0 After she regains her composure from\u00a0a mini-spill, I cheer, “Good Girl!” I am close enough to catch her if she falls all the way down but not close enough that she can use me as a crutch to get where she needs to go. I think she senses this, and it gives her just enough confidence to keep going. Every fiber in me wants to get up and carry her the rest of the way, but I know\u00a0the consequences down the road: She will always expect me to do it for her. She will cry and whine and, when it gets too hard, good old Baba will come to the rescue and move her to safety. \u00a0She gets to the top and turns to look at me.\u00a0 I consciously look away as if I wasn\u2019t watching her every move. \u201cBaba\u2026 up!\u201d The grin on her face makes me fall apart, and I run up the stairs and tickle her until she cannot breathe.\"sufiblog\"<\/a><\/p>\n

This is an everyday occurrence with her.\u00a0 Sometimes she fails and cries and looks up at me with her big green eyes begging for a hand to Providence (at which point I melt like any man would and give in to her tiny wishes) and other times, she gets back up by herself and tries again\u2026 and gets the job done.<\/p>\n

I want her to be safe, but I do not want her to be \u2018soft.\u2019\u00a0 This is the dilemma that most physicians in the academic realm struggle with every day in training the new generation of doctors. Psychology Today<\/em> recently published an article\u00a0<\/a> that discussed what seems like an epidemic of individuals in college who are unable to cope with even the simplest unavoidable day-to-day adversities.<\/p>\n

Although the article dismisses the fact\u00a0that, historically, most psychosocial troubles that students faced were undiagnosed and swept under the rug and that the increase in numbers of those seeking help may just represent a generational recognition of the needs for those services, it still surfaces a serious concern.\u00a0 Many\u00a0people in\u00a0teaching\/training positions in the medical academic realm believe that many medical students and residents lack resilience\u00a0and self-sufficiency.\u00a0 With much discussion focusing on how to decrease burnout, increase physician (and docs in training) access to psych support, and better resident well-being, are we in danger of\u00a0going too far the other way? Are we setting ourselves up for a generation of \u2018soft\u2019 doctors who lack the ability to handle the stress of an occupation defined by its intensity? Internists\u00a0come face to face with mortality, familial strife, and enormous amounts of emotional distress, all while being expected to remain calm, cool, collected, and objective. The reality is,\u00a0it’s the\u00a0physician who is expected to carry the brunt of the stress and mold plans of action for multiple patients every day. Can a \u2018soft\u2019 doctor handle that level of responsibility? SHOULD\u00a0a doctor handle that responsibility?<\/p>\n

Then the question becomes: How do we turn out quality physicians who are armed with the tools (knowledge, skill, AND personal fortitude) from training systems in which the major concern is preventing burnout? This question is difficult, and the process will alienate many as being ill-equipped to handle the job.\"physician<\/p>\n

Finding the balance between developing\u00a0physicians with the capabilities needed to handle the realities of the job AND not burning out a large portion of them before they even get so see a patient autonomously must be the focus of those who control the avenues of training. I do not have a good answer for this question\u00a0\u2014 both endeavors are extremely vital for the future of medicine. Perhaps the answer can be found somewhere in the tale of how a parent deals with his or her child climbing the stairs: letting them take risks, experience the consequences, know the taste of failure, encourage persistence, and celebrate\u00a0eventual success. \u00a0All I can say for certain is that the best part of parenting is when you get to celebrate with them when they\u2019ve reached the top.<\/p>\n

~Yousaf<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I watch as my almost-2-year-old daughter awkwardly climbs the stairs. I do not hold her hand, but I do not turn my back on her either. She is still clumsy, and her little bowed legs often miss their targeted landing spots. She holds on to the rail with a vice grip that steadies each monumental […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1255,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[35,37,69],"class_list":["post-1715","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-about-residency","tag-resident-autonomy","tag-resident-experience","tag-teaching"],"yoast_head":"\nA Generation of Softies<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/blogs.nejm.org\/general-medicine\/index.php\/2015\/11\/a-generation-of-softies\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"A Generation of Softies\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I watch as my almost-2-year-old daughter awkwardly climbs the stairs. I do not hold her hand, but I do not turn my back on her either. She is still clumsy, and her little bowed legs often miss their targeted landing spots. 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